Watching someone you love spiral out of control with addiction is not pleasant. At first, they might be able to keep it together, but eventually, you’ll notice their personal and professional lives deteriorate until they are the withered shell of the person you once knew.
You don’t have to stand by and watch your loved one crumble in such a way. While you can’t force them into drug detox or drug rehab, you can help them make that decision for themselves. Here are just a few steps to take if someone close to you is currently battling substance abuse issues.
Educate Yourself About Addiction
Before you can fully support someone in their recovery, it’s essential to educate yourself about addiction. Understanding addiction is key to offering the right help and being an empathetic, informed support system.
- Addiction is a disease, not a choice. It changes the brain’s chemistry and alters how someone thinks and behaves. The more you know, the more you can approach the situation with compassion and understanding.
- Understanding the symptoms of addiction will help you identify when your loved one is struggling. From behavioral changes to physical signs (such as weight loss, mood swings, or neglecting personal hygiene), knowing what to look for can help you step in at the right time.
- Addiction treatment has come a long way. Researching the different types of treatment available—like inpatient rehab, outpatient programs, therapy, and support groups—will allow you to help your loved one find the right path.
The more you learn about addiction, the better equipped you’ll be to guide your loved one toward recovery and offer them the support they truly need.
Talk With Them About Their Substance Use
In some cases, your loved one might not even realize they have a problem. They might think they’re just having fun, when in fact, they’ve actually become mentally and physically dependent on the high drugs give them.
To break the ice and help them realize the error of their ways, you’ll need to talk with your loved one about their problems. Try to find a time when they’re not high or drunk, as they need to have as clear a head as possible to truly hear what you’re saying. It’s tempting to want to fix everything right away, but it’s important to approach the conversation with care. Here are some key things to avoid when talking to a loved one about their addiction. Use these tips to guide the conversation:
- Use “I” statements to express your feelings and explain how this person’s substance abuse is affecting you. They might not realize their actions have hurt other people.
- Don’t try to lecture, preach, guilt, or bribe. These actions might scare the person away or make them angry.
- Explain that you’re concerned about their health and well-being, and use facts and evidence to support your fears.
- Offer support throughout the recovery process, especially when it comes time to find the right drug or alcohol detox and rehab.
- While you may be deeply concerned, remember that no one wants to feel like they’re being lectured. Instead, use “I” statements to express how you feel without making them feel blamed.
- As hard as it may be, try not to protect them from the consequences of their actions. Giving them money or covering up their mistakes might feel like you’re helping, but it’s enabling them to avoid facing the reality of their addiction.
- Making them feel guilty for their behavior will only push them away. Instead, focus on empathy and understanding. Let them know you’re there because you care, not because you’re angry or disappointed.
- If they’re intoxicated or under the influence, it’s not the time for a productive conversation. Wait until they are sober and able to engage in a meaningful discussion.
Go With Them to the Doctor
The first step in getting care for addiction is visiting a primary care doctor. Your loved one’s doctor can assess their health, determine whether or not their substance abuse qualifies as an addiction, and provide a referral for further treatment at either drug or alcohol rehab. For example, the primary care doctor might recommend a visit to:
- A psychiatrist for medications or behavioral treatment.
- A psychologist for behavioral treatment.
- A social worker for behavioral treatment.
- A drug and alcohol counselor for addiction-specific behavioral treatment.
Help Them Research Treatment Options
If you’re able to break through your loved one’s walls and convince them that treatment is the right option, you’ll need to help them select a program. The possibilities are overwhelming, and when you factor in things like financing and living arrangements, the climb can seem nearly insurmountable. If you’re up for it, try to handle the fine-print details so all your loved one has to focus on is getting better.
Some forms of treatment to research include:
- 12-step groups.
- Inpatient programs.
- Outpatient programs.
- Behavioral therapies.
- Medications.
Be There When They Need You
Helping your loved one start their recovery journey is just the first step. The real work happens afterward. Recovery doesn’t end when they leave rehab – it’s a lifelong process. Here’s how you can be part of it:
- Check in regularly to ensure they’re attending meetings, sticking with their treatment plan, and staying connected with their support network. Your presence, even if it’s just a text or call to say “I’m here,” makes a world of difference.
- Recovery isn’t just about abstaining from drugs; it’s about building a healthy lifestyle. Encourage activities like exercise, healthy eating, and getting enough sleep to improve their overall well-being.
- Recovery is a marathon, not a sprint. Celebrate the small victories along the way, whether it’s one month sober, achieving personal goals, or simply staying committed to the process. Positive reinforcement can go a long way in keeping them motivated.
- Sometimes, recovery feels like an uphill battle. Be a listening ear when they need it. Your emotional support during the tough times can be the anchor they need to stay on track.
Watching your loved one struggle with addiction can be excruciating. However, you don’t have to stand by idly. Take a role in your loved one’s recovery to help them overcome the hurdles they face in getting sober.
